Fear – False Evidence Appearing Real?

death-159120_640For most of us, the hardest part of the wedding speech isn’t the planning or the performing. Instead it’s the fear we all experience when thinking about having to stand up and talk in front of tens (or even hundreds) of our friends and relatives (plus a fair sprinkling of strangers).

You wouldn’t be human if you didn’t have just a few butterflies in the stomach at such a time. In fact, it shows how much the occasion means to you. A little fear is actually a good thing – it spurs you on to prepare properly.

It’s all well and good to say that, but it doesn’t actually help when you’re seeing that day looming closer and closer, like some big monster that you’ll never be able to outrun.

So what is fear?

I’m not a big fan of abbreviations and acronyms, but this one’s a good one. Veer Sharma defines fear as follows:





Think about it. What are you really afraid of? Is it actually something real and worth worrying about? What’s the worst that could actually happen? Are you letting your imagination and emotions get the better of you?

Chances are, the thing you’re afraid of is actually something false which only appears real – when you look hard at it in the cold light of day, it’s nothing to be afraid of in reality.

Keep it in perspective – the speeches are only one small part of the day. Everyone will be on your side, cheering you on, willing you to succeed.

There really is nothing – in reality – to be afraid of!




Peter D Oxley
Pete Oxley is a freelance writer and business manager who lives in the English Home Counties. He enjoys reading and writing in a wide range of areas but his main passions are sci-fi, fantasy, historical fiction and Steampunk. Influences include HG Wells, Charles Dickens, Neil Gaiman, KW Jeter, Scott Lynch, Clive Barker and Joss Whedon. Author of the non-fiction book "The Wedding Speech Manual" and the historical fantasy series "The Infernal Aether". He lives with his wife, two young sons and a slowly growing guitar collection. Probably a masochist: aside from writing and willingly speaking in front of large crowds of strangers, Pete spends his spare time playing music badly and supporting football teams that play badly.

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